Friends, Family, Fans,
I wanted to send an update on my thoughts and feelings
following the 2012 Olympics. This is a little delayed coming and
very long, as it has taken me a little while to process everything,
combined with a busy schedule getting caught up with the rest of my
life. I definitely feel like I owe everyone something in return for
all the support I've received over the last few
years.
I guess the most important thing I
wanted to convey is the feeling of gratitude that I have. I am very
thankful for all the people that have helped me. My coaches,
specifically Dave McKay who spent as much time or more away from
his family for us athletes, the Canadian Olympic Committee, Canada
Amateur Wrestling and others have made my Olympic journey possible.
I feel blessed and humbled to have had the opportunity to compete
at the Olympic Games for Canada, and hundreds if not thousands of
people put me in a position where I had the best chance of winning.
I am lucky to have had so much support and I don't forget
it.
Down to the competition itself. It has been 15 days and I'm sure I
will be thinking about August 10th forever, just like I still dream
about Beijing. I was 16-1 in international tournaments in 2012
leading up to the Olympics, beating some very accomplished
wrestlers and winning my final 3 international tournaments prior to
London. I say this because for me, this was far and away my best
international season and I credit that change in performance to my
mental state of mind. I overcame a lot of mental hurdles to compete
my best this year. I took that momentum into London I am very happy
with how I prepared physically and mentally, and I think I peaked
and competed extremely well. I finished 5th, and I know that 5th at
the Olympics is very impressive. I have been getting multitudes of
congratulations and it is much better than my first
Olympics.
However, I didn't go to London to finish 5th. I wanted to bring
back a medal for Canada and it is disappointing not to achieve my
goal. It hurts, and it hurts worse because I believed, deep down to
my core, that I could do it. To be so close to such a big dream and
then fall one match short is hard. I am proud, and I do hold my
head up, especially with how I prepared and the journey I took
preparing, but at the same time I wanted to win badly and in the
end I didn't. It is a mixed bag emotionally because I am happy with
how I competed, yet disappointed with my finish.
I was asked a few times if I would have added pressure since this
was the end of my career and potentially my last major competition.
To that the answer is no. In fact, the end of my competitive career
in sight actually allowed me to step back and realize how much I
love what I do, and how much I am going to miss it. I love
wrestling and I love competing, but I especially love the personal
challenge and growth that came with pushing myself beyond what I
thought was possible. Wrestling is a personal test, it is one
person against another, and although the physical factors like
technique, strength, stamina, speed play a huge role in success, at
the Olympic level so does the mental aspect. Pushing myself to be
world class, and to be world class in something is a pretty cool
thing. I'm not sure if I will be done, more than likely yes I am
finished but I may compete a couple more times depending on what my
wife and I decide is best for us. As for what I will be doing, I'm
not exactly sure whether I will be back coaching or going back to
school. In the near term at least I will be helping out around town
with a local club and doing a bit of studying.
Finally I want to thank those that have sacrificed the most for me.
My wife especially has had to deal with me being gone 3 weeks out
of a month on the road to follow my dream. Without her support back
home, I would not have had this opportunity. Thank you to my family
who supported me since I started wrestling at age 6, this has been
a lifetime commitment for them as well. However with this support
does come something special. The Olympics was a chance for everyone
to come together, and for nearly 30 people to travel and share my
experiences with me in london is something that I value
greatly.
I've always liked this quote because It kind of sums up how I feel
after failing to achieve my goal so I'll end with this:
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how
the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done
them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the
arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who
strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again,
because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who
does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms,
the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at
the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who
at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so
that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who
neither know victory nor defeat."
― Theodore Roosevelt
Sorry so long!
Best,
Matt